Thursday, August 7, 2008

The Mullet

Let me start by saying that my brother is not a tool. Well, sometimes he is a tool, but only when he is trying to be but then, it's not like he's a real tool, he's just acting like a tool to be funny so that means he's not a tool. Got it?
He is also NOT the type who would ever ask to be photographed in front of a car. Ever. I made him stand there and he thought it was stupid. It probably is, but I am a tool and I don't care.

Ok, on to the meat of this post. My brother, who is not a tool, is very, um, frugal. I wouldn't say cheap, but his wife might. And he drives to the big city every two days for his job as a fireman. So you know these gas prices have been driving him insane. I'm sure he couldn't sleep at night, trying to think of a way to leave the big, gas-guzzling pickup at home. He would have ridden a horse if someone had one to loan him. Or tried to find a way to use the horse's turds as fuel for the gas-guzzling pickup he has to have for his on-the-side painting gig. I know him and I bet he mentioned the price of gas every single time he had to drive to work. Every 48 hours.

And then he found The Mullet. He found this car, which, according to him, gets "unbelievable gas mileage" and he drives it to and from work. I have no idea what year this car was made or even what kind it is. I don't know where Josh got it, but someone took the time to lovingly adorn the words "THE MULLET" to the back of it. I can't imagine why. Except that maybe this car looks like the type of car a dude with a mullet would drive?

I made him pose for the above photo. He chose to pose for this next one. He said "I'll pretend I'm in high school and just got my first car." So maybe he is a tool. But in his defense, he gets it from me.

If you knew my brother, you would know how stupidly funny this is. If you don't know him you just think he's a tool. That's ok, but he's not. He just has a really good sense of humor, especially about himself. He can never be accused of taking himself too seriously.
Check out the front license plate the guys at the fire station made for him.
Ok, I don't know why it says Dirty White Boy. But I do know why there is a Huskie dog on the left. Our high school's mascot is the Huskies. So there's that. And they drew it with funny, gap teeth because even though my brother is adorable, he's been convinced that he has messed up teeth, so they made the Huskie have messed up teeth. The picture on the right is of my brother sweating. Because they've never seen anything like the way he sweats. (Our whole family does this and as a woman, it's humiliating. I'm the only one at wedding receptions who has to change clothes and dry her hair between songs.) Look back at the first pictures. The wet all over Josh's shirt is sweat from working in the yard. For about 15 minutes. So I guess the fire station guys make fun of him for that, too.
"The Real O.C" is for Osage County, which is where we are from. And it is the real O.C. If you don't believe me, just go there.
In case you can't tell, I got a kick out of the whole thing. Saturday night, we were going to go toilet papering in The Mullet, but then realized it was 2 a.m. and decided to be responsible and go to bed. Plus, it's not the most inconspicuous car in the world. I wish I had one.


haley said...

Haha!! I was at Lauren's when he pulled up in it pretty soon after he got it. If anyone can pull The Mullet off, it's Josh!!

cort's momma said...

Oh i love The Mullet and that fact the kids think its a speed racing car!

Your sister also still kickin O.C. style said...

You did fail to mention the mullet has no A/C so he sweats all the way to the big city in it every day!!! When he pulled up in it I totally thought he was lying that he actually bought it for real, so I called Em to tell me the story. Im so glad you posted this, it makes me look a lil less WT.