Wednesday, December 5, 2007

The Christmas Program

All in all, the Christmas program last night was a success. Sure, I couldn't find anything to wear because I haven't dressed up in cute non-maternity clothes in 5 years so it's all either too small or completely outdated. Yes, the girls (a neighbor girl and Avery) overflowed the toilet and it leaked all over the floor in the midst of my "I'm too fat and my clothes are old and ugly" crisis. Ok, so Rhett threw up all over me the minute we got into Avery's classroom at the church (that'll teach me to worry about what I wear!). But all things considered, the night was a success.
Avery looked adorable. She didn't want to love this outfit, but she did. She even asked if she could wear the red bow in her hair. And something about the "girl clothes" made her behavior that much sweeter. I guess "sugar and spice" has a ring of truth to it after all.

Look at her. No fake smile, no Spiderman web hands, no smacking her sister for taking ornaments off the tree. Amazing.

She said she was nervous during the program, though. She looked nervous. She was fidgety and kept sticking her tongue in her cheek to keep herself from smiling.

She reminded me of myself when I was a kid. All of my life, anytime I've ever been on stage or in front of a crowd performing, I assume that everyone there is looking directly at and only at me, so I'm extremely cautious of my expressions and behaviors. It's ironic because, like Avery, I go crazy with the idea of actually being on stage. Can't wait. I have all these grandiose ideas of how fabulous I'm going to be. And then I stick my tongue in my cheek and fidget and worry so much about being cool, that I wind up looking like a complete idiot. Not that my baby girl looked like an idiot. She was precious. I'm just saying, it would be nice if we could just go out there, sing our little hearts out, grinning when we felt like it and enjoying ourselves instead of wondering what all the people in the audience are thinking about us. I think it's genetic.
Oh well...she was happy before, during and after the program. And when she watched herself on film, she laughed at herself for the tongue in cheek business. Like I said, it was a success.

P.S. Reese enjoyed it too. Here she is, during the program, unloading my purse.
Yeah, that's a tampon. In a church. And Avery and I worry about our facial expressions and what we are wearing. Sheesh.

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