Life's Darkest Moment

For a four-year-old who loves "boy stuff," this is one of life's darkest moments. (I am aware she will someday kill me for taking and posting this picture.) Wearing girl clothes. This is her "punishment" for the Night from Hell last night. Here's a brief synopsis of last night's events:

9:15 Sweet husband is in the girls' room, reading and putting them to bed. Rhett is in bed with me because he has a terrible cough and cold and can't seem to lay anywhere, so I'm holding him on my chest so he can rest.

10:30 I'm trying to go to sleep, but my nose is now running and I can't even think about sleeping with snot coming out of my left nostril. I rotate to the other side and it gets worse.

10:45 I get up, pop a couple of Benadryl and get back in bed. My getting up has awakened Rhett, but he quickly falls back to sleep. Husband shows soon after. All is well.

Midnight Avery makes her first appearance in our room, crying. I tell her she needs to go back to her bed and she tries to bulldog her way into the bed and on top of her brother. He is awakened and I am mad. Husband takes Avery to her room. She is screaming all the way.

12:03 Avery is back. Screaming louder than ever. Rhett is now crying. I tell her, through gritted teeth, to march herself back to her room and don't come back. She goes.

12:05 She comes back. I tell her to leave. She leaves.

12:06 Back in her room, she is still screaming, which wakes her sister. Which angers me further. I go into their room to calm Reese. When all seems quiet, I go back into my own bed.

12:10 Avery is back. Wants in our bed. She has no idea how much trouble she is in. Either that, or she doesn't care. I send her back. She goes down the hall, screaming. Rhett is now in our bed crying, Reese is awakened again and screaming. I go back to the girls' room. Avery gets a swat.

12:20 I am back in my bed, all is quiet. I don't hear from anyone for a while.

3:00-ish Rhett is awake, coughing and I am awake with a runny nose. Dangit. I am sleepy. Somehow, I doze off.

5:30 Both girls are in their bed, screaming. Husband goes to them and comes back asking me why their bed is wet. Having been in a dead sleep and pretty sure I didn't' go into their room and soak it, I say "I have no clue." He goes back to the room, comes back to report that, although it doesn't smell like tee-tee, it may be a leaky diaper. He returns to the girls' room, strips the bed and puts a new comforter on it. They are settled.

5:45 Both girls are in our room. Husband returns them to their bed.

5:47 Girls are back. Husband goes to shower and get ready for work. Girls are settled in my bed, somewhat. They are sort of fighting over who will lay next to me and then I clue them in that I have no desire to be next to either of them. I realize my bed is also wet. Rhett's diaper has also leaked. What are the chances of two kids, whose diapers rarely leak, both leaking in the same night? Not sure, but I wish I had bought a lottery ticket last night.

6:30 Everyone is up, bathing. I am washing sheets. Avery is excited to be taking a bath "in the middle of the night." I am not excited about washing sheets in the middle of the night. At all.

This brings us to now. Avery has been punished. If she is not responsible and grown up enough to sleep all night in her own bed at four and a half years old, for crying out loud, then she isn't responsible and grown up enough to pick out her own clothes. Which means I get to choose her outfits. Which means I choose panties instead of boxers and pink sweats for camo cargo pants. Ahhhh, sweet revenge.


Note to all single parents out there: God bless you all. If I had to do last night alone, I'm afraid I would have gone Mommie Dearest on these kids.

Note to my husband: You rock. I couldn't do it without you.